[[ goodbye alice =(

11:25 PM

"Goodbye Alice In Wonderland"

[Verse 1:]

It's four in the afternoon

I'm on a flight leaving L.A.

Trying to think about my life

My youth scattered along the highway

Hotel rooms and headlights

I've made a living with a song

Guitar as my companion

Wanting desperately to belong

Fame is filled with spoiled children

We grow fat on fantasy

I guess that's why I'm leaving

I crave reality

[Chorus 1:]

So goodbye Alice in Wonderland

Goodbye yellow brick road

There is a difference between dreaming and pretending

I did not find paradise

It was only a reflection of my lonely mind wanting

What's been missing in my life

[Verse 2:]

I'm embarassed to say the rest is a rock and roll cliche

I hit the bottom when I reached the top

But I never knew it was you who was breaking my heart

I thought you had to love me

But you did not

Yes a heart can hallucinate

If it's completely starved for love

It can even turn monsters into

Angels from above

You forged my love just like a weapon

And you turned it against me like a knife

You broke my last heartstring

You opened up my eyes

[Chorus 2:]

So goodbye Alice in Wonderland

Goodbye yellow brick road

There is a difference between dreaming and pretending

That was not love in your eyes

It was only a reflection of my lonely mind searching

what was missing in my life

[Bridge:]

Growing up is not an absence of dreaming

It's being able to understand the difference between the ones you can hold

And the ones that you've been sold

And Dreaming is a good thing cause it brings new things to life

But pretending is an ending that perpetuates a lie

Forgetting what you are

Seeing for what you've been told

[Verse 3:]

Ohh truth is stranger than fiction

This is my chance to get it right

And life is much better without all of those pretty lies

[Chorus 3:]

Ohh So Goodbye Alice in Wonderland

And you can keep your yellow brick road

There is a difference between dreaming and pretending

These are not tears in my eyes

They are only a reflection of my lonely mind finding

I found what's missing in my life

[[ lost.

10:55 PM

blocks are driving me crazy.
that's one thing that's driving me crazy.
the other thing is too bad to say.
let's just say it's constantly in my head,
tugging at my heart.
it's like everything's so confusing now i don't know what to do or say.
and worst of all,
i don't even know what the situation is like now.
pleaaase explain to me.
nobody wants to tell me anything.
-screwed-
so i just go about my own life, trying to make sense of everything around me.
i have a weird way of interpreting stuff.

i just feel damn lost without you around.
sigh.
give me a break.
stupid series and sequences. i apply 3 formulae to the question still no answer. GGXX. =(
well if only i could make some sense out of this.

[edit]
omg i solved the question. thanks mr wie for killing approximately 298 of my brain cells. but at the same time boosting my confidence. (: [/edit]
sigh. it becomes so hard for me to do anything right nowadays that i rejoice at the little things i do correctly. [/edit]

[[ my fascination with lao po bing

11:34 PM

i was kinda sad on thursday.
even though it was mummy's birthday.
i was kinda angry with no one but myself.
why do i have to be so friggin' smart all the time. ha. =(
ahah but it's okay now.
not too happy days ):

when there's just too much to say
the words just can't come out.
when there's nothing i can do...
when i don't know what to do..
everything just screws up.

nvm lah! my recipe to being happy:
eat LAO PO BING. (:
haha i just smile like an idiot when i'm eating lao po bing.
maybe i should marry a baker who can make lao po bing.
then i'll have infinite supplies of lao po bing.
ahah.
my fascination with lao po bing.

[[ happy days

3:39 AM

happy days (:

today i was sick. but retail therapy cured me! (:

went shopping with deren! for wenjie's present. hee. i hope mummy likes the present!
then we went OG albert to get what i want! it's some tofu keychain thingie -.-
but it's in those kind of gachapon machine. must put coins in and turn to get it out.
i kept getting the same one! damn suey! always nv get the one i want. ):
then we went national library! omg my first time there. lol. i was sooo suagu. i marvelled at the sensor-operated escalator -.- and we went to play the lift. lol. play the lift. go all the way up to 14th storey, then come all the way down. the lift was suuuper fast. very fun! adrenaline rush. whee. :) after the lift ride i felt nauseous. lol.
after exploring the library, we decided to settle down and mug a bit. to my horror, i left my notes in OG albert -_- so we had to walk back there again. damn far! sorry deren! ahha
ppl who go out with me always suffer :D
yupp then we had dinner and cont. mugging. not v effective though. most of the time i was chattering away or stoning.
i had fun today hahah! i havent been so happy in a long long time.

my lovely pinwheel!!!!
:DD

oh my. waste money!!
$_$

lol some cool exhibition stuff
at the library. can u see me
through the mirror? lol.

[[ ouch.

5:05 PM

im okay.
im just pretending to be emo.
or something.
am i?
ha. don't bother about me.
i'll recover. i always do.

but it doesn't mean there won't be scars.

[[ happy birthday to me?

11:52 AM

Happy Birthday to Me?

okay.. my birthday is over. i had a really good time initially..
but when i went home, i was kinda.. sad? disappointed?
but then mingming and kimmin suddenly popped up with a cake outside my house.
awwwww. i was suuuuuuper touched. (: im glad i have friends like this.
this year, maaany people remembered my birthday.
i would like to say a big thank you to: (in alphabetical order)

audrey
benjamin tan
cheejia chenyang
dextor dianyang daphne deren dorothy
eeloong elaine
fengzhao feric
guowei
huzaifah heidi
jan jialin jianglui jireh juliza justin
kimmin kwang guan kelvin kozun
lili limyuan lzy
max mingming mum
peiyu(hc) pearleen peishan pricilla
rimmel
samuel(6D) serena
weechern wenjie weiquan
xuankai xuefang xuehao
yanrong yanzhi(hc) yanzhi(rv) yeowlin yichun yijie yongwei yuherng yushan
zijie zeehui zhiyuan zixuan

thanks so much =)
thanks xiaobai ricky n shan for the trophy thing =D it's so cute!
thanks peishan and cheejia for the strawberry stuffed toy! awww.

ok.. pictures coming soon.

[[ because your eyes are so important

12:25 AM

Because your eyes are so important
Don't experiment with just any brand.

-_- WTH. IRONY.
that's the slogan of the Renu Multiplus (with moistureloc) multi-purpose solution for soft contact lenses. argh.

i just heard on the news that it has been PROVEN that this multipurpose solution causes fungal infection in the eye. they say fungus grows on the insides of the bottle and on the tip of the bottle because some ingredient in the "moisureloc" thing reduces the effectiveness of the disinfectant. so every time u squirt the solution into the lens case, u are actually putting fungus into the case. what the heck.
to think that renu multiplus was my favourite multipurpose solution! no wonder. provides comfort and fungus. -_- no wonder. no wonder i always kena eye infection. no wonder my eye always so itchy. bleh. stupid bausch and lomb. cheat my feelings.

i don't like liars. i don't like the feeling of getting scammed when i put my trust with someone.. or something. i don't like grey areas. i like extremities. -nods- sometimes.

hahah "So Sick" by Ne-yo is such an old song. but i love it! it's damn nice. seriously. (:

germany 2 costa rica 1. of course i support germany.
but,

I LOVE BRAZIL! ((:

[[ randomness.

8:58 PM

mugging can make you

reaaaally sad.

just look at these two.

aww.

us playing foosball with some kids.

ha! they were having so much fun

spinning that the ball kept on flying

out. totally out of control. lol.

i was like "no spinning!!!" but nobody

cared -_-

ha. never knew foosball was so fun!

i cut my hair! (: hahaha looks like A BOY. or a prc. but i like it. super nice (:

oh yes. i collect tin cases from lovely land in bugis =D haah currently i have 8 or 9.. maybe i should expand my collection soon. sigh. im so unproductive. and our PW is so screwed. GPP not done at all. GG.

[[ artemis camp2

2:56 AM

woot. team challeng pyramid. see the long cargo net there? and the funny colourful wall? that's the rock wall. and yep we did the flying fox all the way down. 35 metres i think. 10 storeys high? woah. exhileration. (:

oh yes. we had 2 super funky instructors zach and yus. zach is just hilarious. hahha. yus plays maple. 3 acc lvl 90++ and one shared acc lvl 100+? omg how does he survive playing maple for so long. -faints at the thought of it-

too lazy to fill u all in on the details of the TEAM CHALLENGE PYRAMID lol. ok lah.

oh yes. rockwall. there was this portion we had to cross. called the "traveller's wall". i'm really bad at rockclimbing. i can't seem to hang on long enough. and i always can't seem to find good footholds. so yeah when i was trying to climb across the traveller's wall, i couldn't find footholds. so, i just slammed my left knee against the wall as a temporary foothold. ouch. abrasion please. then i found an even "smarter" method to get across without using footholds. cling onto the top of the wall. so i clung onto the top of the wall and i basically just shuffled across the wall. now the hard part was how to get down -_- on the way down i couldn't find footholds, as usual. so i just grabbed wensheu and swung myself onto the platform. woah. that was damn dangerous. almost fell off the bloody small platform. because i was so "smart" to climb to the top of the wall, the others followed suit. and they had trouble getting down too. so when wenjie couldn't find footholds to get to the platform, i grabbed his harness and i said "trust me trust me". and i just pulled him over. phew. that was dangerous. but it was fun!

there's one obstacle called "the step of faith". basically there's a REALLY big gap between two metal platforms which we have to cross. and it's like 20m frm the ground liao. and when u look down, it's kinda scary. =X so wensheu took the first step (super brave) and the rest of us crossed safely.
ok then it was cargo net to the top after the step of faith. climbed about 5m of cargo net. relaxing siah. hahaha. i felt kinda safe on the net. yupp. then we reached the top.
i tell u the feeling was wooooah shiok. exhilerating. (: the scenary was spectacular, trust me. looked like some new zealand advertisement. and the sense of accomplishment was tremendous. especially for a weak and totally useless girl like me. hah.
down we went on the flying fox. woah. the first 1 second was "ahhhhhhh" then i stopped screaming. felt damn shuang on the flying fox. super relax.
wenjie shouted "******* i love you!"
limyuan shouted "oh my freak!!!!"
kwang guan shouted "yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaam seng!"
yongxian shouted "oh my god oh my god!!"
some random guy from another group sung "flying without wings" -__-
chunkang was totally silent
chee jia screamed her really high pitched scream.
yupppp. it was a good experience.

it's already 3 am although i know the time at the bottom of this post will be totally off.
i should go and sleep.
night.

oh yes. my birthday is coming real real soon. (:

[[ artemis camp1

12:23 AM

artemis camp was.. fun (:
our team comprised 16 06S6D people and 4 06S6B people, namely nigel ter, qi kai, qi hui and tian yu. hahah their class only 4 ppl went.. so suey.
the first day we started on the high elements. omg. =X i used to have a crippling fear of heights. i remember the time i walked across the shaky plank about 8 m high during sec 3 adventure camp. i was screaming and wailing because i was damn scared. i didn't think i could do the "leap of faith". it's a real tall pole. you have to stand on top of the pole (the diameter of the pole is just about 25 cm maybe), jump and grab a trapeeze bar about 1.2m away from you. in sec 3, i saw how all my friends falter at the top of the pole, having a damn hard time standing up on the pole, even. some just stoned for like 20 minutes until they were let down. they couldn't even stand up on the pole. i never thought of tryin it, because i knew i wouldn't be able to stand up. however, this time i managed to stand up, just like everyone else did. i was surprised i didn't shake much even though i was like 9 metres frm the ground.
yupp. then we moved on to do abseiling (argh dunno how to spell) and rock wall climbling. i chose abseiling cuz i confirm no strength to climb rock wall. so yeah. abseiling. the uncle at the top of the super high tower was damn nice lah. but a bit lor sor. like grandpa. no wunder everyone calls him grandpa. yeah. so i abseiled down without much difficulty. =D whee.
then we moved on to do the TEAM CHALLENG PYRAMID (: i loved it. it's basically a 25 or 35 metre high pyramid with 15 obstacles i think. we did 11. each team had 5 people and we all moved together. there were 5 different coloured stropes (supports) and we took one each. mine was pink. got mixed up with wenjie's quite easily cuz his was purple. i dun understand why the pink and the purple look almost identical. wensheu was our leader. i was the second one, followed by wenjie, yongxian and dunjie. the first obstacle was easy. we had to walk on a metal cord about 5 m from the ground. could hold on to another metal cord so it was quite easy. but a bit tiring since we had to wait for all the team members to get on the rod before we could proceed on to the next platform. all our stropes were connected together so we couldn't afford to move too fast. had to wait for all the team members. yupp. teamwork =D the second obstacle was hard lah. there were 4 hanging ropes and we had to walk across the metal cord using the ropes as support. problem is, there were only 4 ropes, and 5 of us. =/ so we had to share ropes! i didn't share lah. but i was damn scared cuz they ask me to let go of my strope and hold on to the rope only. i wasn't too comfortable with supporting myself with 2 hands on the same rope. but we did it anyway (: and we went to rest in a cage. the 3rd obstacle looked hard. it was a slanted log. we were supposed to get across it withough holding onto our stropes. we could only hold each others' hands. scary. i thought i would lose my balance and fall. but on the contrary, i realised with a bit of confidence and determination, it's quite easy. i didn't look down at all. just kept shifting my feet along the log, and trusting wensheu who was holding my hand. lol. i thought i was quite steady. wenjie and yongxian were shaking like dunno what lah. so after the log, i felt a sense of accomplishment (:
after the log was "jacob's ladder" it's basically a plank bridge with big spaces in between. and the planks are damn small -_- i found this obstacle the hardest. i had to keep on looking down to see where my feet were stepping on. and looking through the big spaces didn't feel very good. i was quite queasy already. wensheu was in a worse situation. his shoe laces came off. lol. and he kept steppin on his laces throughout the obstacle. luckily after jacob's ladder we could rest in the cage.
after that, we went on to the cargo net. i think. it was easy. (:
yawn. shall finish elaborating on the team challenge pyramid tml. the exciting part is at the back!!! (: i feel damn sleepy now.